CHURCH CONFLICT DIAGNOSTIC CHECKLIST Declining Moral Is the adversarial environment unfavorably impacting morale? Strained Relationships Are board, staff, and/or church members experiencing reduced communication resulting in tense and uncomfortable relations and greater isolation? Numeric Losses Is there an increase in absenteeism? Are members leaving? Financial Losses Is there a decline in revenue? Increased Workloads Is there an increased workload those for volunteers who remain to: (a) fill-in, (b) recruit, and (c) train others for abandoned ministry posts, putting strain on the entire system? Ministry Curtailment Is there a decreased volunteer pool or other resources that threaten the continuation of valuable ministries? Degraded Decision Making Are leaders making unilateral or reactionary decisions instead of collaborative or calmly reasoned ones? Have leaders and members already begun to regret things said or done under due to tension and stress? Emotional and Physical Debilitation Is physical and emotional health and stability being negatively impacted? Are people experiencing burn-out or depression? Loss of Vision Has the church lost its passion and vision? Loss of Reputation Is in-fighting undermining the community's perception of your church? Evaluation The cumulative toll of unresolved conflict is quite real. If you have checked three or more categories above, you or your church should seriously consider seeking the knowledgeable help we provide. Jesus himself sanctioned such work (Matthew 5:9). If matters could have been resolved by this point in time by the parties themselves, they would have been. But since the problem remains, a new course of action is clearly required. We know how painful and destructive conflict among friends can be! Don't let pride prevent you from seeking the relief that you and others need. 10 SUREFIRE WAYS TO GROW A CONFLICT Do not acknowledge the existence of the conflict. Acknowledge the conflict but then avoid or ignore those with whom the conflict exists. Privately talk to others to enlist support for you and your position. Continue to say, "We'll handle it" (even though up to this point the conflict has continued to escalate based on your "handling it"). Characterize those causing you problems in very uncharitable terms. Do all that you can to promote your own cause or to save one's own face (i.e. one's reputation, integrity) at the expense of the other side. Take unilateral actions to gain the upper hand. Threaten to leave the church. Fill in the blank for your specific church: ____________________ Fail to obtain the help of an expert church conflict resolution specialist (work which has specifically been sanctioned by Jesus himself, Mat. 5:9).